How to cope on Christmas – struggling with an eating disorder/recovery

During Christmas and new years there is often alot of media and talk about diets and weightloss and it can be hard to avoid.  I would however suggest that you set a rule at the Christmas table that there will be no talk about calories or weightloss or diets if that triggers you…. for me personally, this year as usual there was talk about calories and working out and diets and well I just tuned out , but if it triggers you it might not be so easy to tune out.

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But also remember that you don’t need to go on a diet after Christmas.  Even if you gain weight it’s not the end of the world. Your body wants to stay in balance and homeostasis so it will try to get back to that. You also need to realise what is best for you….. don’t care what others do or plan to do; you need to do what is best for your own health!! Try to avoid magazines for a while and unfollow accounts if they trigger you, or block certain people on fb from coming up on your feed… whatever will help you. But most important try to not engage or promote diet thinking, instead focus on health.  The more people who can find the strength to just focus on health the better!!!

Post – Post christmas detozes and diets – what not to do
Now for the new year you might have friends or family around you who are on a diet or trying to follow their new years resolution. And that can be tough when you know that you have to eat alot and gain weight and it feels like everyone around you is doing the opposite.

One of those tough situations you are put in during and after recovery is when friends or family around you are dieting or eating low kcal. That can trigger something within you, thinking that you are doing wrong by ordering a pasta dish when a friend orders a salad, or you eat a magnum ice cream and your sister takes a popsicle… you begin feeling guilty, anxious, triggered. You get self hate for yourself and believe you made the wrong decision because someone ate something that might be less calories. But you need to stop that type of thinking right then and there. To take a moment to just breath and ask yourself What does it matter what someone else ate/is eating?

It’s easy to  compare yourself to others, look at what others are eating and want to do the same thing. But you need to listen to yourself, know what YOUR body needs. There will always be someone dieting, wanting to lose weight or saying they have already eaten/not hungry. that doesnt mean you have to do it as well.

If you go to a cafe with a group of friends and you all order cake and hot chocolate with extra whipped cream and one of your friends orders a diet cola, it can evoke feelings inside of you. But you know what, WHO CARES. Instead enjoy that you can eat that cake or the extra scoop of ice cream or that toasted bagel etc and know that you will enjoy more food later on. You are giving your body energy, and you know what your friend will still eat later on and if they don’t, well then feel sorry for them. Because a life without food, a life where you are scared to eat and obsessed with calories, that is a very sad life. It’s barely a life at all. Instead be proud and happy of yourself that you are fighting for your health, that you know what your body wants and needs, that you can enjoy all types of food and give your body energy.

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And there will be people who are dieting and trying to lose weight and you know what, some people need to lose weight. Dont get triggered by that… weightloss is not your life goal, some people need it to be healthy that doesnt mean you have to lose weight as well or that you are suddenly in competition or you need to eat less than them.

You are not a monkey, you shouldnt just follow others. I mean if someone jumps does that mean you have to jump as well? No it doesnt.  Everyone goes their own ways and has to know what is best for them.

So instead of focusing on what others are doing focus on what is best for YOU.

When you get guilty feelings or feel triggered by friends or family, take a moment to just breathe and think rationally. Even if that means you go to the bathroom and just try to calm down for a few moments. Or even sit in the bathroom and write down your thoughts… ive done this before, even if it meant i was gone 10 minutes. That was what i needed to do to calm down and then be able to actually eat. Be kind to yourself and your body!! Having a good motto or mantra to repeat to yourself in tough times is also a good idea :):)

I hope this helps. Focus on YOU and YOUR body and YOUR goals. Not on what others are doing.

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Let’s talk about christmas – it’s not all that it’s made out to be

Posts on how to cope on easter when you have an eating disorder (restrictive or binging) – can also be applied to Christmas or other holidays: POST

 

Below are some useful links:

Holidays

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One Comment Add yours

  1. Guest says:

    The pictures are spot on. It is sad that nowadays our holidays revolve more about food than their actual meaning, like getting together and being happy for one another.
    This may be a different topic than the one here, but I would like to hear your thoughts on HAES (Health At Every Size) from both a former ED sufferer and as a nutrition student? I have too many confused feelings about what exactly is the stance I should take, as someone at final stages of Ana recovery.

    Happy Time before Holidays ××

    Like

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